Back in the HCG Saddle

183 lbs. Order is being restored.

Okay, so some folks will not like what I’m doing.

Oh, well. I told you guys I had decided I would do another round of HCG and nobody commented, objected, sent email, called, Facebook message, nada.

I do not like myself obese. I do not like myself overweight. I do not like working my ass off (or literally trying to) and not getting anywhere. As my father once memorably told me, when something I was trying to do was not to his liking despite my sweating bullets to get it finished, “Results get rewarded, not efforts.”

Words I live by.

I’m back on the HCG protocol and it is Day 3 of the Reduced Calorie Phase. This means I take the drops, eat 500 calories (well, more on that. And no, I’m not cheating) and go about my life. To me, this is boot camp to re-establish the discipline that got nearly 50 lbs. off of my body (and some of it back, but that’s been served with an eviction notice).

No personal hygiene products containing oil. Alba moisturizer and crystal deodorant. If you’re rinsing the shampoo out of your hair, it’s not a problem (that’s what the doctor who supervised me the first time told me).

The first 2 days of the protocol are the “Glutton Days”.  You stuff yourself with anything and everything high fat (and protein) and caloric. Over the weekend, I got a lot of cravings out of my system: Carl’s Jr. Bacon Avocado (well, not a craving, but I figured it would be high fat) combo, Ben & Jerry’s Coconut Seven Layer in a brownie sundae, Denny’s (there’s one down the street. I figured I owed it to the gluttony), Five Guys (YES! 920 calories for a regular sized bacon cheeseburger), Fab Hot Dogs (Victory and Tampa in Reseda. I’ll stand them next to Pink’s. Wicked good.), Starbucks foo-foo drinks (which were probably part of the reason I was stalling, gaining, stalling. It wasn’t lack of exercise), Chocolate Coconut Haystacks…

Not as much fun as you might think. My system said to me, “Dude, we don’t eat like this.” (Had I thrown up, it would have been “Bitch, we don’t eat like this.” If I’m not pushing the hard line, it’s friendlier). I felt uncomfortable and bloated. However, these are the rules.

Starting on Monday the 10^th and for 21 to 40 days (after 21, we’ll see), it’s the Reduced Calorie Phase: 2 meals per day consisting of 100 grams of approved protein (chicken, turkey, lean beef, veal, buffalo (I feel guilty), low-fat cottage cheese and the ones I won’t touch: lobster, crab, eggs).Meats are grilled, broiled or boiled. 2 cups of a single vegetable: tomatoes(veggies on this plan), cucumbers, string beans, spinach, chard, onions, radishes, Brussels Sprouts to name a few. If you cook them up, no oil, no butter, no sweetening, no bacon (no Brussels Sprouts). Go ahead and dump oregano, granulated garlic, vinegar, salt and pepper. Fruit: apple, half a grapefruit, an orange, 6-8 strawberries, 12 raspberries (Whoever heard of eating just 12 raspberries? That’s preposterous) and a “starch”, your choices being Grissini breadsticks (2-3), Melba toast (2) or 4-6 Blue Diamond Nut Thins, if you wish to dodge gluten (and I do).

Over the past 2 days, I have adhered to this “One From Column A” sort of set up, but exceeded the caloric intake. Today, I’ll work on sticking within the 500 calorie framework and report back.

This “no oil” protocol means no flaxseed oil during this time. The only supplements one is allowed are B Complex, Vitamin C, potassium and magnesium (which is good for your connective tissues). You can have up to 1 tablespoon of milk per day and the juice of one lemon. I’ve begun starting my day with hot water and lemon (lemon juice is a wonderful thing for your liver, your skin, your gums). (I’m pimping a Simon Cowell routine. Who’d a thunk it?).

I’ve cut back on exercise in the senses that while I’m lifting weights, the amount isn’t as much and I’m keeping the cardio down to one hour per day. Still doing yoga twice a week and Pilates once a week.

After the Reduced Calorie protocol, it’s 3 weeks without sugar or starch, but I can increase my caloric intake.

I’ll report back.