180.2 lbs. Yeah, I kind of earned it. But hey, it’s not 179.8!
(I’ve always hated vampires: bloodsucking fiends who never die, drain you of everything and then make you one of them. Instead, I went to law school. Ba dum ching!).
Yes, that was me on the treadmill flipping a double bird at a commercial starring AHole Rodriguez (Number 13 of the Pinstriped Damned). It’s a reflex.
To the two girls (early 20s) who were standing 10 feet away from me and whispering furiously about me (I heard “fat” and “gross”). Yeah, I could hear you. I’m fat, not deaf, you dimbos. I hope a St. Bernard poops in your shoes.
Today is a day of frustration and self-directed anger. No, I didn’t binge on anything and yes, I went to the gym and worked (frustration is a great way to push through your mental barriers. Of course, if you find yourself choking the ever-loving shit out of someone, perhaps there are better ways to channel the anger. Just sayin’). I will not go into details, but it has nothing to do with the plateau or body. The additional 4 ounces are courtesy of a dry roasted peanut binge yesterday. With wine.
Luckily for me, one of my Facebook friends posted a video of Will Smith talking about success. I’ll see if I can link to it from here, but he spoke of work ethic and persistence and emphasized a difference between talent and skills. He said that skills were developed through hours of working at your craft (whatever it may be). I’d never thought of it that way.
There's Will.
He also told a story about his father making Will and his brother (I don’t know what Will’s brother’s name is) rebuild a brick wall. To the two boys, it seemed like an impossible task that would take forever, but they did eventually rebuild the wall, one brick at a time. As Will said, “You’re not looking to build he whole wall. You go in and you lay that brick the best, the most perfect way you can. And then the next one. Eventually, you will have built a wall.” (I’m not quoting verbatim. I don’t remember it well enough).
I need to remember this advice.
Right now, I’m working to master a task that, frankly right now, is like juggling jellyfish: they squish around and when you think you’ve got a handle on them, they sting you.
(Again, I don’t remember exactly what he said) Will also spoke along the lines of the Law of Attraction: visualizing things the way you want them and just declaring that you’re going to succeed. Where you go in the mind, you can follow in the body. It’s called “manifestation.”
Look, when I started the weight loss project, losing 40 or 50 or 100 lbs. seemed nearly impossible. I can still hear the voices telling me I’m too old to do it, I’ve been sedentary for too long and I’ve failed too many times before this, why should I expect a different result? And yet, here I am scrapping to get to the 50 lbs. down mark which is HALFWAY to 100. If I’m shooting for 80 down, hell, I’ve already passed that halfway point (a couple of times to be truthful. I don’t like spikes and plateaus. Did I mention that I don’t like spikes and plateaus? I really don’t). I mentioned that I had pulled a bunch of jeans from storage that, way back when I put them in there (years ago), it was with the thought that I was foolish to hold onto them; who was I kidding? I’ll never fit into those jeans again. Well, I got into 3 out of 4 pairs of them yesterday, so I must be doing something right.
“The Little Engine That Could” is about overcoming obstacles through positive thought and persistence (Note: you can overcome a lot of obstacles this way, but you may wish to rethink if your goal is to smash your head through a brick wall). Belief in self is the cornerstone of success. “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can” has been heard so often in America that it has become trite. The sentiment may be a simple one, but very often, the simple concepts are the ones that become powerful mantras (which we then try to strip of their power through mockery). I will adopt this concept, but rephrase it for my own purposes: “ I’m going up that motherfucking hill and when I come back down, I’m going to punch Jillian Michaels in the face.”
Step 1: You’ve got to KNOW you can before you show you can. Then you get to punch Jillian Michaels in the face.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6anpCwPT9qA&feature=feedf
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