Today is what you’d call a “really good day.” I had a second interview for a job that would have a 60 mile round trip commute (doesn’t bother me. I used to ride a bus between Concord, NH and Boston, MA to work on a document review project for $15 an hour. And we were defending W.R. Grace over asbestos. I learned the following terms on that project: “tremolite asbestos”, “crocidilite asbestos” (not harmful. There’s blue and there’s white) and “mesothelioma.” ). I was an enjoyable interview; I think I’d enjoy working for the guy who interviewed me. When I got home (after a detour to the gym. I missed yoga, but I got in an hour on the elliptical. Wonky Right Knee isn’t objecting too badly), there was a conditional offer letter from ANOTHER company whom I’d applied to over a month ago and written off as “well, I guess they’re not really interested.” Nope. They want me (based on what another friend wen t through after her offer letter, this is going to take some time). And a head hunter presented another opportunity that looks to be in my wheelhouse (so to speak).
I’m enjoying this moment. This is (potentially) having my choice of 3 really good offers.
I manifested this. I made this happen.
Yeah, I said it: New Age-y “If you can conceive it and believe it, you can achieve it” kind of crap. Creative visualization, vision boards, affirmations, all of it.
Of course, you don’t just sit back on your ass and wish. “Marry that thought to an action.” (I think I ripped that off from a M*A*S*H episode). Visualization helps you see the roadmap. You still have to walk it.
I was listening to “Haunted Playground” today on LA Talk Radio (http://www.latalkradio.com/. Show available as live stream from 3-5 Pacific time on Tuesdays and archived programs for on-demand listening). The host(ess) Sheena Metal and Danielle Egnew, a psychic medium and musician (http://www.danielleegnew-advisor.com/ Is that not a sweet face?), discuss things not of this Earth (Oith, if you’re from Brooklyn). Today, the hot topic was manifestation and whether it’s legit. They touched on “The Secret” and how people generally want to manifest material things thinking that happiness lies in having the items. The talk morphed into people expecting gold starts and Nobel prizes for common courtesy and making amends for the harm they cause others (the example given was getting a blood test, but going to the wrong lab for it, which caused extra work and inconvenience for the tech at the lab). I tried to call in to weigh in BUT NOBODY ANSWERED THE PHONE.
Here’s what I wanted to add to the conversation (and since it’s me-focused, maybe it’s just as well that I didn’t get through on the phone): manifesting, working to manifest something in your life is not the same as wishing. Wishing is a passive activity. Manifesting is more dynamic and requires effort from the person seeking to manifest. Danielle was talking about “spiritual physics” (first time I’ve ever heard the phrase) and the electric charges of negative thought and positive thought. I can’t speak to that, but, as with weight loss and other topics, I can speak to my personal experience.
I want to manifest a lean, healthy and (to my mind) attractive body. I want to be happy with what I see in the mirror (which, due to a horrendous night’s sleep looked pretty beat this morning. Hey, I’m over 50 and I was tired. That’s why God created concealer. And foundation). Did I expect to wake up the next morning a size 6? No. But what started was thinking twice before putting something in my mouth, walking rather than taking the elevator, drinking more water. Then, I started seeing a therapist who told me about HCG and referred me to an acupuncturist who offered this. And then I was off and running on my weight loss project. I found an Android app for recording weight, calorie intake and calorie output and tracking of various metrics. It kept me honest. Unexpected money came in that allowed me to join the gym. I had the time to join Lila’s yoga class and learn some resistance moves from Torquemada the Trainer (who is now training on her own). I got a job that paid well enough and was structured, timewise, to allow me to continue working out 6 days a week. I found the Atkins “candy bars” (still love those things). A session with another therapist got me looking into the Paleo diet and in researching that, I found www.nerdfitness.com and www.marksdailyapple.com. Through those guys, I modified my diet again and I feel healthier. The Great White Belly is still putting up a fight but I’m winning. I’ll try to get someone to shoot pictures of my legs. They have never been this toned. I started doing pushups (and now chin-ups) and that’s made a difference in my body fat. I don’t look in the mirror and see a “twinkly-eyed temptress” (I just threw up a little in my mouth. I’m sorry, that phrase is brain gouge. It’s a 5 car wreck of a phrase; I am repulsed but cannot look away. Samantha Brick, you need a shrink. And an editor who will wash your mouth out with soap every time you write drivel like that), but I’m liking what I see a lot better than what I used to see.
Like I said, creative visualization will reveal the roadmap, but you still have to make the journey.
What else can I make happen? I want to write (creatively) for a living. I got the idea of starting a blog about my weight loss (and anything else that comes to my attention and the challenges facing a “woman of size.” I got a few followers and then started sharing link to it on my Facebook page. More hits. I created a Facebook page for the blog. More followers (some of whom I don’t know), more hits (we’re over 8,000). Now, it’s on Twitter; I’ve posted a link in with my comments on some other blogs that I like and that has driven traffic. Look, Ma, I’m building an audience.
Because I’m such a wit, a comedy website, www.dognewsteam.com, invited me to write for them. One sketch has been turned into a video, two others are “in the hopper.” On my vision board is “Final Draft,” software for writing screenplays (format things properly). I don’t have it yet, but if I keep writing stuff, maybe the money will flow in that will allow me to buy it or maybe someone will give me a copy. Right now, though, what I DO have has allowed me to start writing comedy again.
I have written one novel and have notes, ideas and chapters for others. Unlike Stephen King (and Snoopy), I do not keep the rejection letters that I’ve gotten from various agents and publishers. However…since I started writing 11 years ago on that bus ride between Concord, NH and Boston. (On my way home one night, I stopped into a CVS, got a “composition book” and started writing by hand), Amazon has introduced the Kindle. Access to a potential audience is no longer strictly through the turnstile of traditional publishers (with wannabe editors in their early twenties guarding the gate. “Ordinary People” was rescued from a “slush pile” – unsolicited manuscripts. I honestly don’t think it could happen now) or “vanity publishers” where you pay a hefty fee up front for a small run. $39.99 and an uploadable manuscript will buy you access through any number of services that will make your e-book available on Amazon and other outlets, no printing costs to be considered (or used as leverage in negotiations), no twenty-somethings new in the business saying, “Yeah, it’s good, but we can’t figure out how to market it.” (Oh yeah, I got this one thrown at me). J.K. Rowling, before whom I would genuflect, got rejected a lot for Harry Potter (and she also started with a pad and pen). I’m hearing that she actually got “Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone” published and it sold pretty well. Well enough that she wrote some more books about Harry. The latest publishing sensation is “50 Shades of Grey”, which started out as (ugh, I can’t avoid saying this) “Twilight” fan fiction. Technology is providing a way for me to jump the turnstile (If you’re interested, I’ll let you know when it’s ready. Just let me know), but I still need to make the effort to make it happen.
The way will be revealed.
I wanted an acting career ever since I was about 6 or 7 years old. Of course, I was sitting in Vermont and California was soooo far away. It took me until I was 40 to say, “You know, I’ve got to do this. I’m sick of saying ‘what if.’” 10 years ago this week, I left Concord, NH in a snowstorm on April 26, 2002. I had 4 cats, a Ryder truck, kidney stones and a best friend recovering from cancer surgery. And I love being in LA. I am grateful every day that I am where I want to be. Have I conquered the airwaves or movie theaters? No. Not yet. But I’m coming back around to it. People with nothing to gain from it tell me they like my writing.
I have “made a demand upon the Universe” for income. Today, I have 1 job offer and the possibility of 2 more. Understand that I didn’t just sit back: these came about because I updated my resume on careerbuilder and Monster and followed up on search agents I had set. I’ve built a body of work in this field and a good reputation already, which gives me more options than if I was a newbie.
I still want income and time sufficient to allow me to write and work out. I may have to rework my gym schedule to accommodate a commute. That’s okay; I know how to eat better now and I can always do pushups and other “body weight” based exercises that don’t require being in the gym.
I’ll get there. You’ve got to follow the Yellow Brick Road. The Emerald City isn’t delivered. (Ruby slippers, my ass)